squirtchamp

I bet you thought I abandoned this blog.  Didn't you?  Well, you thought WRONG!

We were just away for a while having some good family fun.  We felt it was best to introduce the boy to all the family craziness at once.  Like ripping off a bandaid...just get it over with!

He actually did great.  He got passed around to all the grandmas and great-grandmas and aunts and uncles and neighbors.  Let me tell you, he was a trooper.  There were times he got a little cranky, but apparently when you're not his mom or dad that's easy to ignore.

The biggest milestone while we were away...he slept through the night...TWICE!  And I'm not talking about 10pm to 2am.  We had that nonsense down weeks ago.  No, I'm talking 9pm to 8am...TWICE!

What he's not yet smart enough to realize is that I'm onto him now.  I know he can do it now.  I will him to do it again every night when I put him to sleep.  Really it just means that I go crazy now when he wakes up at 2am (like he's been doing the last couple of nights).  Soon enough he'll realize that sleep is AWESOME!

Ok so, now onto other nonsense for those of you who are interested in such things.

We went for our two month checkup yesterday and the Squirtmonster was monsterific!  First of all, he's awesome.  Second of all, he's enormous...14.4lbs and over 25 inches long.

He only cried while he was actually getting his shots.  As soon as they were done poking him and I picked him up he was interested in the picture on the wall and not the pain in his leg.  He is a little under the weather now but come on, the little dude got like 10 vaccines!

So yeah, he was awesome.  Mama, on the other hand, was a total airhead (please keep your comments to yourself)!  

So when we got back from our trip I cleaned out the diaper bag because everyone we know has pets and I wanted to wash everything in the bag.  Good intentions, but what happened was that I ran out of the house with an empty diaper bag!  Awesome.

Luckily it had diapers in it.  But that was about it.  So when I got him undressed to weigh him he had the tiniest spot of poop on the leg of his onsie.  So I reached into the bag to get him another one and realized it was empty.

But never fear, I said to myself.  It's not a big deal and I'll just be really careful and make sure I get him a new diaper immediately and we'll be fine (because we had a long list of errands to run after that).  Then the tech asked if I had a blanket to keep him warm while we waited.  At this I had to admit my bad motherness and tell her no.  But again, no prob, they had an extra.

So after Squirt got poked and prodded and examined and sung to and fed I put all his clothes on him and got ready to go.  When I laid him down to put his socks on him it happened.  Sneak attack!  I didn't even see any poop on him, but it was all over the exam table.  

And I mean all over!

So here I am, in this sweltering exam room, freaking out.  What kind of mother am I?  It's -10 degrees outside and I'm going to have to take my child out to the car naked!!!!!

So I started to get him undressed, again, and I remembered that I had put a little, tiny, adorable hooded sweatshirt in the bag (because it was -10 degrees outside).  And as luck would have it, his pants were completely poop free. (Yes, poop all up his back, but none on his pants.  I try not to question it.)

At that point I thought, he's completely clothed, we're going out.  So my little man went to the mall looking like a playa in his hooded sweatshirt with no shirt on underneath.  When I texted George the picture of him he was like why is he not wearing a shirt?  I tried to explain, but it didn't translate well over text message.

Oh well, lesson learned!

I'm off now, to try to get some sleep and pray that the babe only wakes up once tonight!

He says: Yeah, I'm the king of this bed!

answer me this

How is one's mothering style determined?

Is it what your own mother did?  Or didn't do?

Is it based on the most recent parenting book you read?

Does your personality decide what kind of mother you're going to be?

I think that parents are like athletes.  Some people are natural athletes.  We all know these people.  We hate them.  Natural athletes can throw any ball, swing any racquet, and swim any stroke... and are normally super attractive (like I said, we hate them).  But you can't forget about the rest of the athletes.  They are just as good as the natural athletes (although they probably have fewer dates) but they have to work really hard at it.

I am the latter, in both the athletic and parenting worlds.  I'm being the best mother I can be, it's just that not one part of this job comes naturally to me.  I mean, come on, I'm still trying to find my mothering style.  My kid keeps changing his mind and his schedule, so I keep changing my angle on mothering.

I think my mothering style will ultimately be a combination of all these things (although George wishes I wouldn't read so much trendy parenting advice).  Hopefully, one of these things can steer me in the right direction.  Otherwise my kid is screwed!

who knew?

Who knew that breastmilk was so addicting?

This guy is seriously addicted.  And when he needs a fix, he needs it now! When he's hungry, he's in seek and destroy mode.  He turns into a bloodhound, trying to sniff it out! 

But the best part, is his breastmilk hangover!  After he eats, he gets this drunk look...his eyes are only half open, he's sleepy, and he can't hold his head up.  Sometimes he even throws up...ahhh, just like a real hangover.  It's hilarious.  But since he's pint size it only last a short amount of time.  A five minute nap and he rallies!  

Also, it is during this time he makes my very favorite face...the Stevie Wonder face.  I'm not trying to be insensitive, he just looks exactly like him...I just called, to say, I love you...

Who knew I'd get peed on so much?  And, who knew I wouldn't care?

Ok I don't love being peed on, I mean I'm not Rex Ryan!  But my Squirtbaby is just so cute I can't be upset about it.  What I don't love though, is the laundry.

Who knew that my boy, who got my blockhead, would have a profile that looked exactly like his dad, who does not have a blockhead?

Seriously, it's the cutest thing.  And it freaked me out when I saw it the first time.  So handsome, my boys.

Who knew I'd be so upset about my giant boobs?

If I were a man, I'd be a boob man, but these are seriously ridiculous.  I hate them.  They are in my way.  And have you seen these nursing bras?  What's a girl gotta do to get a supportive nursing bra around here?  Seriously, there is no bra on this planet that could make these girls look perky right now.

Who knew?

 

Isn't this picture the cutest?!?!  Squirt is loving two of his warmest gifts, his Patagonia coat and his baby sherpa boots!  We took advantage of the beautiful weather today to go on another walk.  George had him in the carrier again and said he could relate to me being pregnant because he couldn't see his feet!  Yeah, try carrying that load for 9 months and then we'll talk!!!

So we took our Squirtmonster to the pediatrician this week for his two week check-up, in his third week of life!  Turns out...he is a giant!  My three week old infant weighs 10lbs 13 oz!  Yeah...that's right!  

My girlfriend's daughter was born two days after Squirt and I'm pretty sure she said she weighs 6lbs 13 oz.  I mean, Squirt could eat her for lunch!  

The baby is seriously huge, no wonder he wants to eat every hour!  Mama, however, is not so happy about that part!  Do you know how exhausting it is to nurse every hour???  Do you know how little I can get done during the day when I'm nursing every hour?  Does anyone know when my Squirtgiant will learn to cooperate with his mama?  So many questions...

Ok internet peeps, I'm off to nurse...again!  And then hopefully my pride and joy will decide to sleep for 6 hours (wishful thinking)!

you can call me mr. i-pee-all-over-everytime-my-diaper-is-changed

Here's a good one: I've never taken care of a baby boy before!  

I have a sister.  I don't think I ever even babysat for a boy that was still in diapers.  Therefore, changing baby boy diapers is brand-freaking-new to me!  And it is an adventure every single time!

When we were registering for baby gifts, I saw these little "peepee teepee's", and I thought they were ridiculous!  But now I know why someone would think to invent this.  Actually, it could be the most useful invention ever.

Specifically, my boychild pees all over himself approximately 85% of the time he has his diaper changed.  He finds it particularly upsetting when he hits himself in the face.  His mama finds it particularly upsetting when he pees all over freshly cleaned sheets!  We're working on a better system!

*****

This afternoon we ventured into the wild outdoors!  I think it was good for all of us to get out of the house.  George put him in the carrier and the three of us went on our merry way!  It was fun and relaxing!  Also, it made for a good photo op!

pardon the interruption

I'm sorry I've been neglecting my little blog here.  I've been kinda busy...having a baby!!!!

Yep!  Our baby has arrived.  Well...he actually arrived about two weeks ago (yes, I'm being vague on purpose).  Basically, he is the best baby that ever lived!  And he is ours!!!  In fact, he is Squirtastic!

Labor was somehow wonderful and horrible at the same time.  I will spare the details for anybody who is about to have a baby or who is contemplating having a baby.  But just to be clear, no matter what happened in those two days in the hospital, waiting for my baby, it was all worth it.

He is amazing.  He hardly cries, but when he does it breaks my heart.  He eats like a champ, but what else would you expect from a nearly 10 lb baby!  

And very important, my Squirt is a little man.  There is no mistaking my baby for a little girlie.  He looks like such a little boy.  And I can't wait for my little boy to know his mama and hold out his little arms for me.  But in the meantime, I'll settle for watching him sleep peacefully on his daddy's chest (it's all I could ask for).

*****

As an expectant mother, I made every attempt to be prepared for the arrival of my child.  In the end, I decided that it was best to be prepared to be unprepared.  This was the best idea I had in nine months.

Oh.My.God.  There is nothing you can do to prepared for the arrival of your first child.  I'm acutely aware of that now...and I got lucky with this one!  

But, the crying, and the feeding, and the pooping, and funny faces while he sleeps.  Nothing could prepare me for this.  I almost never know why he's crying.  I never know when he wants to eat (which makes venturing out of my house terrifying at this point).  You never know what to expect in the diaper, but the explosive poop (which only happens when his dad changes him) is hilarious.  Oh and I've been peed on more times in the past two weeks than I would care to admit to!

And the faces, oh the faces.  His little face makes the most unique expressions while he sleeps.  Including smiling.  I'm desperate to know what he dreams about.  I imagine it goes something like, where's the boob, I can't find the boob, I need the boob, oh there it is....yesssssss.

*****

If I could rewind for two seconds, to a pre-baby topic, I would like to share the funniest thing I've ever seen.  A friend of my sister's, who is quite hilarious if I might add, likes to read this blog and she was curious about the belly photos.  

Apparently, it warranted an internet search (the network as my grandmother calls it)!  And this is what she found!

The best part is that I looked at the first picture and laughed.  Then I sent her an email that I was completely disturbed by the link.  But later, I was showing George and he scrolled down, something I had neglected to do.  Oh...it got MUCH worse!  So click on the link and make sure to look at the WHOLE page!  It's worth it!

*****

Ok, so here's what I'm sure you've been waiting for.  And since I'm not currently emotional and freaking out I'm going to post some little photos of my pride and joy!  (Sorry family, I don't think any of these are new to you.) Enjoy!

I'm off to partake in some QT with my boys now.  Peace!

are we there yet?

This is what you look like when you are 40 weeks pregnant, all your finals are done, you're done working, you can't sleep, you're uncomfortable, and you're NOT DILATED AT ALL!

Translation: I'm over it!

I was pissed when she said I wasn't dilated at all.  This is how that conversation went:

OB NP: Well, you're 50% effaced.

Me: And...

OB NP:  And, that's better than last time.

Me: (In my head) That was three weeks ago!  Of course it's better than last time!  Unfortunately, 50% effaced isn't really helping me out here, lady!!!!  Grrrr. 

*****

So, I promised I would show pictures of the nursery.  And I have them.  Unfortunately, they're not turning out like I was hoping.  But you can see our wonderful, made-with-love bedding and wall art!  

The problem was that because the room is so small I couldn't get a good angle.  Either way, here are some pictures of the future location of our Squirt...once he vacates my uterus!